Memoirs of an Average Unaverage Guy: Entry 7- Rude, Arrival, Cats & Some Other Stuff

7:32 p.m.

It happened again. I hate it when it happens. Someone said I was rude. A good friend this time, even. Makes it even worse. I always get called rude when I’m really not trying to be rude. I’m not rude; I’m blunt. You can generally tell when I’m trying to be rude to someone because I’ll probably be threatening to shove a various body part of their’s into a different various body part. That or I’ll call them any sorts of a variety of colorful words, such as the all-time classic “Dumb-ass,” or something creative and vulgar thought-up right on the spot like… “Chicken-Cunt-Nugget.” Maybe even the elegant British “Cheese Eating Surrender Monkeys” if they happen to be French(no offense to French people… don’t look at me, look at the British. It’s their insult). Anyways. Getting sidetracked. I hate it when people call me rude and I’m genuinely not trying to be rude at all. I hate it even more when a good friend says it. What happened was my friend was sick in her apartment all day, and she sent me so crazy filtered selfies because she was bored. Well, I said “You have problems,” and she got offended and said I was rude. I don’t know, I guess I figure that any good friend of mine is used to my sarcasm and bluntness(is this even a word?) but I guess I can’t assume that.  Anyways, we talked it out and we’re fine now, but it still made me sad. :Reminds me I’m not considered “normal” and that I have trouble talking to people.

8:21 p.m.

Saw the movie Arrival today with Aunt Kathy. Not sure what I think about it. The story relied on a really big plot point about time travel that they just spring up out of nowhere 2/3 into the movie, which I don’t like. Anything that involves time travel is confusing, so that doesn’t help it.If you’re going to have time travel in your movie, don’t try to explain how it works. You’re just going to confuse people. Just put it in the movie and let people figure it out themselves if they want to think about it so hard. Because how can you explain something that doesn’t exist for us yet? It was still an amazingly made movie and they really did a good job enthralling me with the story. Not many movies out there portray aliens as good guys, so I’m glad they did in this movie.

I don’t really know what to write. Think I might just play some video games or watch some YouTube/CrunchyRoll/Netflix until I passout from the day. I spent a good hour street driving a completely new route to me. I experienced my first school bus. I get it now. It’s like driving behind a permanent red light that flips you the bird in the form of a stop sign every time it decides to say “Fuck you” and flash it’s red lights. One of the kids tripped on her way out and face planted so that was kind of funny. Not trying to sound like a dick, it’s just funny when someone doesn’t look where they step and end up ass over tea kettle. The girl was fine and laughed it off so that’s good. Obviously if she had seriously hurt herself I’d be out that truck and on her in 5 seconds flat making sure she didn’t die (If you’re not me and you’re reading this, I’ve been working as a lifeguard for 2 years now).

My fucking cat Yugi almost exited the page, I was about to have two dead cats. Nah I kid. I’m actually still really sad about my cat Joey dying earlier this week. Yugi is actually Joey’s twin brother, they were born in a litter of 4 kittens. Three orange and a black one, with three boys and an orange girl. Joey(2), Yugi(3), Marik, and Blondie (Yes I got most of their names from Yu-Gi-Oh!, and the number next to their name indicates how many cats had that  same name before. Think numbers for people, but for cats. Garfield the Third. King Charles VIII. So there was one Joey before this Joey, and two Yugis before this one now.) Marik(the black one) and Blondie(the girl) died early as kittens. Joey and Yugi lived past kitten-ry(???) and grew up to be pretty nice cats. Yugi still isn’t even a year old, his birthday is in April. I can probably find the exact date because pictures I took that day of their birth should be time stamped in my phone. Anyways. Joey just got hit by a car last week, so Yugi is it now from my kittens. I have a lot of cats since my mom is a vet and she takes in a lot of strays or cats that lost their homes. Most are just strays that hang around the backyard and you can’t even get near them; but there are a few good ones that come into the house and get petted and they really are “pets” you know? There’s Tiger(a literal living mass of fur that does nothing but relax all day), Grey(first generation kitten, old man now, has always been my main man, neutered), Cookies(doesn’t do much honesty… half the time I forget he even exists until I see him in the yard or something, neutered), Yugi(not neutered but also not old enough to be a daddy), the LSBD quadruplets(also the current generation of kitten mothers), Fire(kitten), Red(father to most of the kittens), Batman(negative twin of rainbow, neutered), Rainbow(positive twin to Batman, spayed), and there’s a new kitten named Scribbles that’s starting to open up to me. Lot’s of cats. Thank god by some miracle they all use the same litter box.

10:06 p.m.

I could talk about my cats all day honestly. I probably should’t. I think I’m going to try to get Yugi registered as a therapy animal so I can have him with me in my college dorm. Of course my new room mate would have to be okay with that. Hopefully I like him. We haven’t really talked much, he just came over one time to drop some stuff off in the dorm before break. My old room mate wasn’t the most entertaining guy to live with, so hopefully this guy will be better. He seems better so far. At least this guy actually has wall decorations for our bland ass pale cream walls. Seriously, how could my last room mate live with no decoration what-so-ever? He didn’t even have a computer screensaver or background for fuck’s sake. Honestly. Something wrong with that boy. I’m trying to buy weed in my home town instead of my college town, and it’s proving to be harder than first anticipated. First off there’s not nearly as many that deliver. I don’t have a car, so unless a meetup point is within walking distance I need delivery. Then the ones that do deliver either got jacked up attitude or jacked up prices. I should’ve bought more for break. I thought 16 g’s would last me, but I’m scraping the bottom of the barrel with what I have now(literally). I’m slowing down on smoking now anyways though, need to start getting back into the school routine. I only allow myself to load up .2-.4 grams a day now, as opposed to the .4-.8 I was loading out earlier in break. I probably should’ve done the math so I’d smoke an even amount every day of the break, but nothing I can do about it now. I talked to my mom about weed some more since I asked her to change a 100 for me so I had bills to buy more. She still says she’ll grow some if I get her some seeds. She’d probably end up smoking it herself. I laugh, but it might be worth a shot if I can find something reliable. The effects of almost daily smoking throughout this winter break have been obvious though. I’ve generally been a chipper and happier person than I have been in years past, and I’m much more vocal than I was a few months ago. Once I get back to college I’ll be back to a 3-time-a-week smoke schedule, excluding little night-one hitters to help me sleep. The sleep aide is actually really nice. I love sleeping after smoking, it is the deepest and most restful sleep you will ever have.

Think I’m done writing for today. If you’re reading this, I hope you’re having a good day. Stay frosty.

10:41 p.m.

 

Memoirs of an Average Unaverage Guy: Entry 6- Classic Rock, Fighting as a Kid, People’s Painting of Me

12:10 p.m.

Went out driving this morning like I said I would. I think it was my best run yet, except for when I floored Aunt Kathy’s truck over a curb. Oh well, live and learn. Anyways. I love Classic Rock. I have a playlist on Spotify that’s just filled with The Rolling Stones, AD DC, Kiss, Queen, etc., and I love this playlist. Classic Rock has just always been my go-to, my favorite music. Lately I’ve been listening to a lot of rap, but classic rock always comes back. I grew up with a CD player, not getting my first iPod until I was 12. I had 3 artists that I had CD’s for growing up: Michael Jackson, Elvis Presley, and Queen. Queen was always the favorite though. We Will Rock You was the first Queen song I ever heard. They played it in elementary school P.E., when they made use run laps. They would lower the volume whenever the verses started mentioning kicking can, so all I heard was a jumbled mess of children running on the tiled floor and the music volume dropping in and out, but I knew I liked whatever it was that I was hearing. Shortly after that, I discovered the name of the song after asking around. Then, the next time little elementary schoolkid me went to a Walmart, I bought a CD. Queen’s Greatest Hits, 1992 album cover. 

6:40 p.m.

Was cut off early from writing and got sucked into some call of duty. Now me and my mother are at one of the nicest places to eat here. So nice they they give you popcorn and soda for free while you wait to be seated.  That’s pretty cool I guess. I figure it’s probably because this is my last Sunday home and the last opportunity for a nice meal before I head back to college. I can’t wait to go back to college. Life is just so much easier and fulfilling back home. I’m laughing in my head right now because this restaurant that I’m at uses saddles as it’s bar stools, and this middle aged Asian man looked at it for 10 seconds with a confused look on his face while he tried to figure out how to sit in it😂😂😂. I wonder if emojis will show up in my blog. Personally, I love emojis. They help personify text and show your would-be facial expressions. There’s a kid in here sagging down past his ass. I thought these idiots were all gone. I never understand people that do it; I mean it just looks so dumb and it only hinders you.  I remember in middle school there was a kid that sagged down to his knees. Thought he was hot shit but could barely speak past a first grade level. He liked to talk a lot of smack and start a lot of shit. Back in middle school I got into a lot of fights, and this kid was one of them. I was playing Yu-Gi-Oh with a friend of mine at lunch and I guess he didn’t take to kindly to that, so he came over and swept all of our cards off the table. Wasn’t a long fight since it happened in the cafeteria at lunch time. Teachers were able to break fights up quickly back then. We were all small back then, it wasn’t like how it was in highschool. Much easier for a teacher to pull two 12 year olds off each other than to pull two 17 year olds off each other. 

8:11 p.m. 

Anyways. I fought a lot back then. Lots of bullies. I was always a target as a kid, from elementary to middle school. I never liked to just sit and be picked on though, I liked to fight back. Unless it was a fight I’d clearly lose. Then I liked to sit and be picked on🤔. Middle school was really bad though. Honestly the worst 3 years of my life. Didn’t really have any friends, I got bullied a lot, I fought a lot, I got mixed up with the wrong crowd… Man fuck middle school. Let’s just get rid of it, abolish it. Hell, let’s just get rid of the number 6 7 & 8 in general. Good bye and good riddance. I’m kidding of course. 

I wonder what my writing looks like to other people. I wonder what people that don’t know me think of me. Hell, I wonder what people that do know me think of me. Whenever I read, my mind always paints a mental image in my head of the writer. What I imagine they look like. What I imagine they sound like. What I imagine their tone to be. I wonder what other people paint when the read what I write. Or even when they just see a picture of me. Or see me walking down the street. Shame I can’t read minds. 

Well, dinner’s done and I don’t really want to write anymore. If you’re reading this, I hope you’re having a good day. 

8:46 p.m.

Memoirs of an Average Unaverage Guy: Entry #2- My Mother, Pot, and Stupid Action Movies

8:27 p.m.

One of my bracelets is breaking. If you don’t know, which you definitely don’t since you don’t know who I am, I wear bracelets. Nothing flashy, just some rubber ones and some rope ones. I go through bracelets every now and then, such is to be expected when I wear them 24/7. Normal people get watch and Chaco tan lines, I get bracelet tan lines. The one on my right arm broke recently; which I still need to replace it =_=,  and now one of the rubber ones on my left arm is breaking. –sigh– I don’t know why I’m even bothering to write this down, it was just something on my mind I guess.

Anyways, lets talk about the day since I last left off. I went out to eat at Cracker Barrel with my mother. First off, if you don’t know what Cracker Barrel is, it’s this Southern-breakfast/dinner-country store-kind-of-place, and the food they serve isn’t bad. Stuff like country fried steak, pancakes, eggs, pot roast, chicken tenders with sawmill gravy, you get the idea. Second off, my mother, and the relationship I share with my mother, is complicated. My mother and I are two very different people, and we each have our own set of… issues that keep us from getting along all the time, or most of the time. My mother is, in short: neurotic, bipolar, senile, hoarding, hard of hearing, disgusting, and might be suffering from Alzheimer’s. You probably think I’m being a little harsh. Trust me, I’m not, I’m just being blunt. That’s not to say I don’t have my own issues. Asperger’s, the memory of a goldfish, the lack of general perception, a general sense of narcissism, ADHD, and being antisocial in general. We either tend to fight a lot, or to have these awkward moments. We’re in an awkward moment right now. I’ve been smoking over break, since I have literally nothing better to do than to play video games and watch Netflix, why not smoke alongside it? Well, earlier in the week she insinuated I was smoking and asked if I was but then quickly backtracked and said she didn’t want to know yet. Well, since then things have been a little weird, but nothing to fret on really. I figured I’d spend some time with her to show her I was fine, so that even if it did in fact turn out that I were smoking, it’d be okay since I was still somewhat social and functional, and it wasn’t effecting(or is it affecting?) my schoolwork. Well, cut that plan cause she caught me smoking last night. Well, not actually smoking, but she smelt smoke in my room; and she commented on it. I can’t really handle social situations when I’m high, so I didn’t really respond. That’s made things pretty awkward between us right now, but I don’t see this as becoming anything big. I honestly halfway expect her to ask me to let her try some. Her sister clearly smoked at some point, I feel like my mother would’ve known this, and they’re still friends today so why would it be different for us? Well, she did know it, because she said it at dinner tonight.

.

..

HOLY SHIT. 

I just realized I’m completely headcased. If you don’t know what that means, it means being really really really high. I just got this new water pipe and I think I hit it too hard. Good thing I’m writing this down, or else I’d never remember it.

Sorry about that. Anyways. So yeah. That happened at dinner tonight with my mother. I kind of got sidetracked. That tends to happen when I write. I usually edit it for school writings or when I write little stories, but I think I’ll leave it as is. After all, they are my memoirs. Part of the reason I’m writing these is because my head is always brewing with ideas, but I never remember them later on. This way, by keeping a daily written accord of myself and my thoughts, I have a written record that I can always reflect back on. Even if no one reads this stuff, as least I’ll be able to look back when I’m old and look at my writings from years past. That’ll be cool:).

Tomorrow I’m going out with my Aunt Kathy(who’s not really my aunt but basically is) to see some movie called The Accountant. I have no idea what it’s about but based off Aunt Kathy’s tastes and the title, I’d have to say it’s probably some shoot-em-up movie where some badass codenamed “The Accountant” shoots a bunch of mother fuckers that come after him for either something he did in the past or something he didn’t do at all, where along the way he most likely will have some sort of female and/or children to care for and protect that may/or may not be threatened. He will then proceed to brutally murder every bad guy in his way until he saves the day and kills the biggest baddie of them all. Sounds like a great Aunt Kathy movie. See, I like intelligent film, really I do.But I also love just watching some stupid shit that is meant to entertain me for a short while and then I forget about it a few days later. These ridiculous action movies are great for that. Great “brain filler.” In my mind, these movies are great to reflect on later in my head. They’re just great fodder to think about reflect back in your head later. Then in a few days, you forget about it, aside from random instances where it pops back into your head. Until you watch it again later in life, only to replay it some more in your mind for the next few days, then you forget about aside from random spikes where it briefly crosses you mind; until you watch it again even later on in life, and rinse and repeat. Really is kind of crazy to think about.

Anyways, more about Aunt Kathy later. I think I’ve done enough writing for now lol, it’s 10:03 p.m. already. Uh, if anyone is out there reading this, thanks I guess for being interested enough in my life to read this thing? Shit I don’t know man, just thanks I guess. I don’t know what for, but thanks.

Memoirs of an Average Unaverage Guy: Entry #1-Introductions I Guess?

1:00 p.m.

Let me start off by saying I have no idea what I’m doing. Not a clue. I’m just a college kid looking for a writing outlet. I’ve always enjoyed writing. The ability to let your mind wander and guide your fingers to create exciting adventures and enthralling tales and to then share these works with others has just always amazed and enticed me. Now, I just want a way to share what my mind is able to guide my hands into creating, and I figured blogging was one way to do it.

Now, I guess I should introduce myself. I’m 18 years old, a guy if you couldn’t tell by the title, I go to a university of 40,000 students where I am studying for an English major with a teaching certificate. I enjoy video games, cooking, writing, reading, watching/studying films and shows, and generally being in a positive position in life. I have Asperger’s Syndrome, which is high-functioning autism. If you don’t know what that is exactly, I definitely recommend you look it up. Basically, as far as I can tell it means I perceive and interpret things in life a little differently. Anyways. That’s enough about me for now. I’m still not sure whom I should be addressing these writings to, myself or an audience? I don’t even know if anyone other than myself will ever read these. I guess it doesn’t really matter in the end if no-one reads it or if everyone in the world reads it. This is really just for myself and just having the ability to share my writings with others is good enough.

I guess I can talk about my life goals. I want to be a high school English teacher, a published author, and big-name movie director. I want to be a name that is remembered by many long after I’m dead. But that’s just the job stuff. I want to graduate college. I might want to go to film school. I want to start writing books. I want to watch films and learn all these different techniques and film tricks. I always feel that there is so much to do in life and never enough time to do any of it. We all have other priorities in life we have to take care of. Jobs, school, sleep, social groups, stuff like that. All that stuff takes time. So you can’t do everything that you want to do all at once. You have to space it out, handle one thing at a time while you also take care of your other priorities. As someone with horrible time-management skills , this is not easy for me to do. So I often bounce between things alongside my priorities in life, but I’m going to try to stick with this since I see this only bettering me.

4:30 p.m.

I took a short break from writing, just to kind of focus on some other things. Had a short smoke in that time. It’s winter break right now so I don’t really have any priorities like school or work to focus on, so I’m able to smoke more frequently than I normally do. There’s a lot of stigmas and stereotypes about people who smoke. It doesn’t really matter to me. I like to smoke and that’s all there is to it really. Anyways, lately I’ve been watching a lot of shows. Sherlock, That 70’s Show, a few anime here and there. I re-watched Archer for the second time; still my favorite show right now. Sherlock was pretty amazing although confusing at times. Yesterday I started Narcos though, and it’s been pretty good so far. It’s interesting to think about how cocaine really was such a problem in the 80’s and it’s crazy how much trouble it caused. Well, I’ve hit a wall for writing for now. I’ll update when I think of something.

6:12 p.m.

I just finished episode 2 of Narcos. I was fine with the episode until the end, where they hang a cat. That really upset me. I really like cats and just the other day my cat got hit by a car so seeing this dead cat reminded me of  my cat. I miss my cat, he wasn’t even a year old yet. The rest of the show was pretty good though. It’s a little dark though, in the sense that there’s no humor, so I’ll probably only watch it an episode or 2 at a time. Not that it isn’t a good show, it’s just that I need a lot of humor in my life so shows with no humor tend to get watched over time. Speaking of shows, there are a lot that have been piling up that I need to watch or finish watching. Jessica Jones, Arrow, Bob’s Burgers, Stranger Things, Gotham, Narcos… not to mention what’s in my Crunchyroll queue.